Project Runway: Reunions, Revelations, and Runway

Overworked fabric
Puu-Puu platter of techniques
Valerie is out.

Let’s flip the order on things a little: I’m sad that Valerie’s out – she was one of my favorites early on, and it was tough to watch her burn out the way she did. But I won’t argue with the choice – that outfit was not only ass, it was ass that was repetitive of something she’d done better earlier in the competition.

Now the episode itself: Congratumalations, Lifetime. Big Standing O from me for that one. You managed to do that exactly right. It would’ve been so easy to make Mondo’s revelation over the top, or shmalzy, or obviously manipulative.. . .in a word, Lifetime-y.

But you managed to be hands off about it. You managed to just let it happen on his terms, and by doing that, you got an hour of television that was evocative and emotional without being. . .Lifetimey. And it’s something that worked so well, I really can’t say much about it, not just because I don’t want to be a dick, but because it really stands on its own.

So bravo to you, Lifetime. No pun intended. Let’s look at how you did it.

Morning! New York! Atlas Apartments. Valerie talks about how she didn’t expect to still be there after the last challenge, and wants to fight on for Ivy. Gretchen feels that Mondo is her biggest competition.

In the guys’ apartment, Mondo says it’s “unreal” to win 2 times in a row, and he feels as though Andy is his biggest competition.

They head to the runway. Heidi, struggling to retain enough screen time on this show to still even nominally qualify as the “star” of this show, comes out and tells them that for their next challenge they’ll “start from scratch.” She then tells them that Tim will explain the rest, since she can’t be bothered with menial things like “explanations” and “logic,” and then goes off to roll around in her giant pile of money, and probably have Seal impregnate her again.

They then arrive in the workroom to find embarrassing childhood photos of themselves displayed on their product placement HP computer monitors. Mondo’s include several of him in costumes – one where he’s a darling little matador, and one where he’s dressed in some sort of harlequin costume and sitting at his desk in school. The other children are out of focus, but I’d like to believe that they’re all dressed in totally normal clothes and that young Mondo just felt like being a harlequin that day.

Tim tells them he’s delighted to introduce Tracy Trachta from HP, who is there because they’re recycling the “create a fabric” challenge from last season. Tracy Trachta makes with some blah blah blah about technical stuff and everything you can do with the HP computers they’ve been shilling all season. Tim adds that the point of departure for their fabric must be a “deeply personal” moment from their past.
They have an hour for fabric design, and two days for the challenge. Their fabric will be delivered tomorrow, and they’ll have the chance to buy additional supplemental fabric.

Design time! They all talk about their pictures. It’s very cute. Valerie’s design is going to be based on her dad’s house designs, because she grew up loving the plans he would bring home. Michael C. has a brother named Stanky and a sister called Peaches. His design is going to be based on the evil eye they all wear. Gretchen grew up with a Southwester influence, so her pattern is inspired by her mother’s sun-hat and Native American Squash Blossom jewelry. April’s is inspired by her parents’ divorce.

Mondo talks for awhile about his relationship with his parents and keeping secrets. . .anyway, it comes out that his design is based on a plus sign to represent his HIV positive status. He tells us he’s kept this a secret for ten years. His parents don’t know, and he doesn’t want to live like a coward anymore.

And all of us smart asses go silent for once. And I find myself in the same position now – I want to be able to say something about Mondo’s keeping this secret for so long, and his decision to disclose at this time and in this situation. But at the same time, this moment is the rarest thing – a reality TV moment that seems to arise as organically as possible – and I don’t want to trivialize it.

Anyway. After we collect ourselves, they all head off to Mood. Andy is playing with ideas of circles to represent memory bubbles. Christopher is using blue for his mom. Valerie plans to design the way she did at the beginning of the competition.

In the workroom, Tim arrives and tells them he’s about to send in some special guests “and be nice to them, please.” And with some screams of “oh my god!” we cut to commercial.

Back! The surprise guests are. . .their moms! A lot of sobbing goes on as Valerie and Andy hug their moms. Gretchen doesn’t see her mom at first, and assumes that she won’t be able to come because Gretchen’s step father is in a wheelchair, and her mom can’t leave him.

Oh, but wait – there she is! She comes in with some random blonde lady. Oh, the random blonde lady is April’s impossibly young and hot mom. And then some children and little people arrive and hug Michael C. Apparently one of them is his son, because he says “Hi, son! I miss you so much!”


Ok, since when does anyone younger than Ward Cleaver call their son “son?” Does the kid not have a name? Has Michael C. not bothered naming the kid yet? It’s like my great-grandmother – her parents were so disappointed to have another girl that they just called her “Baby Girl” for the first three years of her life. Then the maid asked my great-great-grandmother when she was going to name the child, and my great-great-grandmother said “well, what’s your name?” And they named the baby after the maid. Which, really, when you consider that they’d named their elder daughter “Floy” of their own free will and without any prompting, is probably not the worst thing that could have happened.

I am not making any of that up, by the way. But I digress. Anyway, the little person Is Michael’s Mom – she’s not an actual little person, just a tiny Italian mother, much like my own. Last to arrive is Christopher’s partner, J.J.

Tim tells them that there’s an additional surprise – he’s suspending the workday so they can spend time with their loved ones.

Mom montage! Valerie and her mother go and eat pizza. Andy and his sit at an empty park table. April and her hot mom get pedicures.


Mondo and his mom talk about a breakdown he had during the show, and how he won the $20,000. Michael C. tells his mom about the under-the-bus throwing during the team challenge. His mom is basically like the love child of Lorraine Bracco and Marlon Brando, and tells him not to let the others get to him. Christopher and J.J. sit on a red couch and hold hands. Gretchen and her mother have a weirdly pragmatic talk about how she won the Marie Claire challenge, and how that’s what they wanted – something that would get her some exposure.

Mondo’s mom gives him a bracelet she brought for him. He wants to tell her about his HIV status, but feels like he can’t because of Catholicism and not wanting to ruin the moment. Oh, Mondo. Commercial.

Back. Next morning. Atlas. April wishes a happy birthday – she’s 29 today. They talk about how renewed they are from seeing their moms. Conversely, in the guys’ apartment, Andy feels like he’s off his game after seeing his mom.

At the workroom, their fabrics await. Gretchen’s looks like some ticky-tacky Southwestern tourist crap – having lived through the ‘80’s and ‘90’s in Arizona, there’s nothing that rubs me the wrong way so much as shitty “Southwestern” design. I’m betting Gretchen grew up surrounded by pastel coloured coyotes and “authentic” Kokopellis without ever realizing that he’s not playing a flute, he’s. . .well, playing his own flute, as it were.

Mondo gives Valerie a birthday button, and everyone compliments each others fabric. Valerie is taking the time in this challenge to do paper patterns, since she thinks not doing that is part of what threw her off in the last challenge. Andy feels off his game.


Tim thru! April tells him the story of her divorce-inspired fabric. Tim tells her that he respects her emotions, but he worries that the judges won’t. He thinks Michael’s dress is beautifully done, but tells him it needs to fit exquisitely. He thinks Christopher is over designing the pants.

Gretchen helpfully chimes in and tells us that she thinks Christopher’s work is a C+. I really wish they’d stop asking her opinion. Anyway, Andy is having a hard time making decisions, and is struggling to focus. Commercial.

Back. Continuing the Tim thru, he checks on Gretchen and tells her he doesn’t like the butt flap on her pants. Well, that should really go without saying, right? Unless you’re buying footie pajamas for your toddler, nothing that can be described with the words “butt flap” is ever any good.


He warns Valerie that her dress is in danger of looking like an ice skating outfit, and that it could easily become “a puu-puu platter of construction methods.” Mondo tells him evasively about his pattern because he’s not ready to talk yet. Tim likes it.

Tim then reminds them that there are only seven of them left, and he chokes up a bit. This episode is full of emotion.

Models! Christopher worries about his pants making his model look old. Andy is hoping that he’s safe.

Day of Runway. Atlas. Andy thinks his work is ok, but “ok is never good enough.” The girls talk about Andy’s look not being Andy, and Michael’s look being like Andy’s. Valerie wants to be in the top to redeem herself.

Workroom. Tim tells them they have an hour for their usual product placement jazz. Their models enter. Christopher is nervous, but Michael eels confident. Then he sings a country song he’s written for the occasion. Andy talks about how Michael has opened up and is getting along with everyone.

Makeup and Hair flurry, and then one last pass through the workroom, where Gretchen decides against a sweater and Val tells us her work is fashion forward. Commercial.


Runway! Heidi Hallos them wearing the tackiest outfit in the history of Germany – which is saying something. The Germans are an inherently tacky people. This looks like a clown onesie. Anyway, the judges are Kors, Nina, and Rachel Roy, who is gorgeous. Let’s start the show!

April’s outfit is first – it’s another very April-ish black dress, this time with one sleeve done in her “divorce” fabric. Someone in the living room says it looks like something Johnny Weir would wear.

Andy has made a grey top and some stupid shorts that look like they’re left over from one of J-Lo’s old Flygirl costumes. Mondo’s are highwaisted pants in his signature fabric, and a black checked halter under a jacket that looks like it was inspired by his childhood matador costume. It’s gorgeous.


Valerie has made a blue and black tiered skirt with a ‘90’s looking illusion top. Tragic. Gretchen has made black pants and a top in her $5-a-yard-by-the-side-of-the-road-at-Four-Corners fabric. Michael has constructed another snooze of a black cocktail dress. We finish with Christopher’s grey pants (with the ubiquitous exposed ass zipper) and an off the shoulder top.

Heidi says they want to talk to all of them. They begin with Gretchen. Heidi likes the print and the silhouette. Kors thinks that the pants are “great” and compares the look favorably to Olivia Newton John. Nina says it’s “just fine, not wow,” and Rachel Roy says she wrote down “almost.”

Next they move to Michael. Kors says his print’s not exactly a “wow,” and that the outfit is funny like a joke. Nina thinks that better styling would’ve helped a lot.
Rachel Roy doesn’t see the water idea in Christopher’s print, and feels like the silhouette was an afterthought. Nina thinks it’s fine, but not fashion. Heidi wrote “nice, safe, boring,” and Kors says a number of things, all of which fail to make an impression on me.

Moving to Andy, Rachel Roy likes the print, but says the outfit is “odd and confusing and upsetting to me.” Nina says that the “emotion that I get from this print is very sad,” and she’s disappointed in Andy. Kors think he dumbed himself down.

April explains the idea behind her divorce print. Kors says he got the sense of friction and pulling, and likes the idea of the print. Nina says it’s a charming print and she likes the silhouette. Rachel Roy says it’s her favorite print, and she likes the way she used it.

Valerie is next. Heidi points out that it looks a lot like the napkin dress from the party challenge. Kors says the skirt looks like paper that she took the life out of. Nina finds the effect very heavy. Rachel roy likes it, but thinks the blue underskirt is poorly attached.

They finally move to Mondo, who tells them that his print is very personal and tells a story. Nina says she wishes she knew what the story was. And with that hanging heavily in the air, we go to commercial.

As we return, Nina reiterates that the outfit is terrific and looks really good. She loves that he’s not afraid of prints and colors. Kors says it has sharpness and joy. Rachel Roy is hung up n the perfection of the print, and Heidi says it’s well put together in a kooky way, and Nina adds that it’s editorial, and if she had to shoot one of the looks, that’d be it.


This seems to be the encouragement Mondo needs to tell them his story: He swallows hard, and says “the symbolism in the pants actually are these plusses are positive signs, and I’ve been HIV positive for 10 years. And when I saw these pictures of my family, it brought back a lot of emotions. And so I wanted to pull from the past but I also wanted to give something back of who I am now. And that I’ve been so scared of and hiding from. And that’s just. . .that’s the story.”

Nina thanks him for sharing that with them. There’s not a dry eye on the runway. Heidi says it was very brave of him, and Kors nods gravely. Mondo tells them that he feels a lot better for having said it – “I feel free.” And now there’s not a dry eye in the living room either.

They send the designers back to the greenroom, where Gretchen tells Mondo she feels grateful to have been part of him opening up.

The judges deliberate, starting with the worst. Rachel thinks Andy’s was the worst, and Heidi calls it unwearable. Dude, when Heidi Klum thinks your outfit is unwearable, you know its ass. They talk about how he fell apart, and Kors lisps “fashion is not for sissies.”

Valerie’s was the worst to Kors – it was ill fitting and looked like an ice skating costume. Rachel liked the fact that it had some fabric manipulation.

Christopher’s was boring. Kors thinks he knows how to sew, but makes unmemorable pieces. Michael’s was an odd mix and old fashioned.

Kors likes the idea of Gretchen’s print, but Nina was disappointed. Kors reminds us that “hands down, she’s the best stylist.” Which is a winning strategy if the show you’re on is America’s Next Top Stylist, not Project Runway.

Nina thought April’s silhouette was beautiful , and Kors liked the idea of the print. But we all know the real story here is Mondo. Kors liked the mix of prints, and Nina says it was smart, chic, and fashion. Kors also likes that the print says “I’m going to find the positive in this” and work with difficulties in life and not let it stop him.

Commercial.

Back. April is in. And Mondo is. . .the winner! April hugs him and tells him she’s proud of him. He says revealing the secret is the real prize.


Gretchen is in. Michael is in. Christopher is in.

So it’s down to Andy and Valerie. They liked Andy’s print, but the look confused them. And Val’s looked like 2 bad dresses glued together.

So Andy is in, and Valerie is out. She says she’s proud of her garment because it honored her father and she feels like a family with the designers.


Back in the green room, she thanks Christopher for being so kind, and Andy for being so funny. She apologizes to Michael C. for being unkind, and tells Gretchen that they’ve been roommates since the beginning. To Mondo, she says he inspires her to want to do more, and tells April that she’s a kind person under the badass exterior.

Tim enters. “I’m gonna miss you most of all” our little Dorothy tells our well shod Scarecrow. Ok, not really, but she should’ve. Tim tells her that she has extraordinary character and a huge heart. And Valerie clicks her heels together three times, and is transported back to. . .Cleveland.

Tim tells Mondo he’s proud of him and what he said on the runway. Mondo admits that he’s still scared to tell his family. I hope he told them before the episode aired.

Next! Heidi is their client, and other nightmares. I don’t like Heidi in the workroom. There’s no reason for you to be rude! Drama out the wazoo.