The First Ever "Here Go Hell Come" Haiku Happening

Ok, pepperoni sauces. Let's see what Calvin Tran and my absentmindedness have inspired you to.

As you may recall, I apparently conked my head on the overhead baggage compartment of an Air France flight, rendering me unable to remember what a Haiku was and to have an entire "Limerick" contest wherein I asked you to complete an unfinished Haiku.

Once this was brought to my attention, I decided that in the interest of equal opportunity I should throw a Haiku contest wherein you were asked to complete a Limmerick. And I named it after Calvin Tran because I kind of miss him (he won a Soup award last night on The Soup! It was very exciting)

So: vote for your favorite in the comments before 6 a.m. on the 7th. Winner will be announced in the reunion post, and will get their choice of a sample of limoncello batch A (availability date to be determined); a dozen of Dale's cookies; or a post detailing a recipe following YOUR CHOICE of the "Last Supper" quickfires -- canned goods, one pot, or hot dogs.

And the nominees are:

A) Tonight in the FINAL Finale
Two Top Chefs will both try to rally

Chef Blais will conjure a meal

Pig Isabella will squeal

And for Richard, the judges will tally.

-- J

B) Tonight in the FINAL Finale

Two Top Chefs will both try to rally

I hope it's not Mikey.
That douche, me no likey.
But I'm confident Richard will rally.

--Susan

C) Tonight in the FINAL Finale

Two Top Chefs will both try to rally

For Blais, Spike will spy,

Tweak ice cream, they'll try,
And Isabella gets kicked to the alley!

--rwhitaker1966

D) Tonight in the FINAL Finale

Two Top Chefs will both try to rally

Mike tries to show class,
But he's still such an ass,
And Blais can vacation in Bali!

--rwhitaker1966

E) Tonight in the FINAL Finale
Two Top Chefs will both try to rally
Mike wins the battle of meats
But he loses with beets
Blais adds one more win to his tally

--Anonymous 3/31 14:48

F) Tonight in th FINAL Finale
Two Top Chefs will both try to rally

Congratulations to Blais
Isabella leaves in a haze
Top Chef Masters, please don't dillydally.

-- Anonymous 3/31 19:50

G) Tonight in the FINAL finale

Two Top Chefs will both try to rally
Pepperoni sauce made Mike a contender
In the end, he's just a pretender
Tongue and Cheek gets Blais the winning tally

--rwhitaker1966

H) Tonight in the FINAL finale

Two Top Chefs will both try to rally

Oysters and pearls show one's whimsy,
The other's beet salad was all too flimsy,
Richard Blais is judged best in the galley.

--rwhitaker1966